Ayman Barbaresco, 30
Public speaker, community advocate and student
Cis male, Gay
He/him
Ayman’s childhood was far from the norm in Coffs Harbour. Diagnosed with a neurological disorder called neurofibromatosis at birth, frequent hospital visits and countless medical procedures became a regular part of Ayman’s life as he developed scoliosis and various tumours.
“I have the whole kit and caboodle!” Ayman jokes.
Throughout primary school, Ayman always understood that he was different from his peers and didn’t fit in. By the time he was 12, Ayman became very aware of his attraction to boys.
“I had a crush on some star on Home & Away and loved boy bands like N’Sync, Five and the Backstreet Boys. At the same time, I had discovered the word “gay” on the internet and just understood it as someone who was attracted to the same sex. So I figured that was me.”
On a quiet Saturday afternoon, Ayman decided he couldn’t keep the secret anymore and interrupted his mother while she was doing the ironing to tell her he was gay.
“She just gave me a big hug and said that she knew and that it was OK,” remembers Ayman.
“Mum and I had a very close bond having gone through so much together with my medical situation, so I felt really safe and comfortable to tell her anything,” Ayman explains.
By the following year, Ayman came out at school and was not fazed by any potential backlash at the revelation.
“On top of everything else, I was a chubby kid and developed early onset puberty at nine. So the doctors decided to manage that by prescribing female hormones, causing me to then develop breasts! I was teased all sorts of things before I even came out so I figured being gay was the least of my worries. School wasn’t such a fun place and I really struggled,” Ayman shares.
At 30, Ayman continues to battle with various health issues from time to time but attributes his resilience and courage in coming out to the challenges he has faced since birth. Ayman remains positive and optimistic and uses his experience to educate others on the intersectionality of sexuality and disability.
Photo notes:
Shortly after our interview, Ayman had to undergo surgery at the Peter MacCallum Cancer Centre. This portrait was taken a day after his surgery, when I visited him.